Cave

In response to the assignment "draw your secret place" as well as a lingering thought of the prior assignment, "draw your alter ego", I disintered an ugly scrap of self from my guts and attempted to express it. This is the shower (would look shiney white to you) where my demons could show, where I could no longer hide the conflict, desolation, etc... within that I swallowed behind a smile when around people. There is also some hatred of the place, here, because of the hatred I felt for my own emotions/weaknesses.

I used a combination of french pastels, charcoal, chalk, and graphite in this piece. It's on a very thick stock of paper, but the layers of pigment are probably even thicker. It's a shame that it is impossible to see the depth of those layers in a photo. There was so much pigment, it became a somewhat pliable substance all it's own. I slicked down the layered colors with hard graphite in some areas, and roughed it up with charcoal in the others, trying to bring the textures alive a little. This drawing is not precise. The tiles are off, for instance. I forced myself to draw very quickly in order to avoid giving myself time to think over the emotions, although the layers ended up taking quite a lot of time. I was trying to capture my cave, as in my sanctuary, as well as show the daunting darkness you might expect in such a cave. There is also some hatred of the place, here, because of the hatred I felt for my own emotions/weaknesses. Accurately drawing a shower was just not that important.

I'm normally against verbal explanation of art, since a visual piece should need no such crutch to make it's impact, but I thought you might be curious, so I shared.